We Let In Light and Banish the Shade

I have a Christmas organizer, which is an entirely different post all together. In this organizer though, I have my Christmas card list of names and addresses. Every year (well, really the years I remember to actually use it), I look at the list and who I sent and received cards to and make updates to the list.

This year, I erased 2 spouses from addresses. There is something sad about erasing a name from a Christmas card list, because the person no longer lives with their family.

Not Ready to Make Nice

It's time to choose between being Naughty or Nice. I think that I have always chosen Nice. I am the quintessential nice girl, with about a decade's worth of heartbreak to show for it.

The nice girl remembers birthdays. She is called in the middle of the night to talk about the latest problem, to rescue someone from a bad situation or just because she makes herself so available people assume that she will be up at 5 AM. She knows that you mentioned you liked (Insert Just About Anything Here) and she makes sure you have it for (Insert Closest Holiday Here). She celebrates her friends’ everythings - even when they don't want to celebrate. She makes everyone feel special (and secretly she wishes for reciprocity).

She is the one that everyone trusts. And everyone confides in. She is faithful, loyal to a fault and believes the good in everyone. (She is often burned, because she can’t see the scheming bastard for what he really is). She is not a huge risk taker, because she is more worried about being there to support other people's risks.

She is often relegated to the "friend zone," because most men aren't ready for her yet. She is the one that most guys talk to, because she is smart, witty, fun and easy going. (This can be a problem, because her nervousness often manifests itself in biting wit and quick responses). She is the one who sits at the table and wishes that someone there would see her as a feminine object of beauty worthy of doting and affection. She is the one who usually ends up answering questions about her friends. And in turn, she is a really good wingman. She is often surrounded by many and sometimes she couldn’t feel more alone.

She is the ultimate party hostess, often negating her own fun for the sake of making sure everyone is taken care of and enjoying themselves. She goes out a lot, but sometimes she longs for her couch, a roaring fire, a good movie and someone to cuddle with. She really just wants someone to be there for her like she is for others. To wax poetic, she wants somebody to love (and be loved by).

The problem with being the Nice girl is that try as she might, she isn’t good at the Naughty. That being said, this Nice Girl’s gonna give it a shot. This year I am hoping for coal in my stocking. (Of course, the stocking will be one that was knitted and hung by the chimney with care by the nice girl who always keeps Christmas in her heart).

Too Hot To Handle

There has been great debate about the new Bond. Will he be good enough? Most women I know have said they don't think he is as cute as other Bonds. I saw Bond right before it came out and I loved it. I won’t give anything away, but this movie is great at the following:

1) Action – The opening action sequence is awesome.

2) Sensuality – There is a scene in the movie that will make the non-believing women become believers.

3) Character Development – This movie helps you see how Bond becomes Bond – it sets an amazing stage for future movies.

I always liked Bond and enjoyed the movies, but this movie might have made me an addict. I have been reinvigorated by Casino Royale and look forward to another installment. And weirdly enough, he gets cuter and cuter throughout the movie. By the end, I was sold.

The Last 5 Days

• I am a Notre Dame fan and a Bears fan. This was a rough weekend for me.

• I loved Thanksgiving dinner - it is one of my favorite meals of the year. Kudos to my mom for once again making it a really great day. The only downer of the day was my Uncle who is annoyingly contrary just because. He walked in with a "Happy F-ing Thanksgiving." Needless to say, that set the tone for his presence. Sometimes it amazes me that he can walk upright with that chip on his shoulder.

• I survived shopping on "Black Friday" - no bruises, cuts, scrapes or war stories. I like shopping on that first day (crazy sounding, I realize). It gets me excited about the upcoming season. It is always my mom, my aunt, my sister and I. This year, sis's b-friend came with and he was a trooper.

• I even survived IKEA on a Saturday - better yet, the Saturday after Thanksgiving. Changing my whole living room and needed some small things - actually excited about the decorating aspect.

On a side note, I feel like the first day back to the office after Thanksgiving is the longest day ever. Goodness. I clock watched all day.

Soup Up! The Fight

I went to CVS to pick up some cans of soup to donate at the Mart today. The Loop, the Greater Chicago Food Depository, Eli's Cheesecake, Potbelly's, Jewel, the Chicago Sun Times and others organized an event to collect food donations for Chicago's largest one-day corporate food drive event. It was festive (the Rockettes kicked it off and various choirs sang all day); it was food-filled, after giving a donation, I received a Potbelly's free sandwich ticket and Eli's cheesecake; it was amazing to see all the food palates and information on how many people this collection would help.

This event was just the kickoff to the season of giving. The next 5 weeks are the perfect time to share the spirit with one another. Now is the time to buy that Streetwise from the person outside your Jewel and put money in the Salvation Army Bell Ringer's cup. It is the time to buy a Toy for a Tot (or a Teen) in addition to your PS3 and donate some food to the Food Bank while you buy your holiday trimmings. It is the perfect time to take a moment, remember all that you have been blessed with, give thanks and extend a helping hand to another.

Please check out these causes:

The Greater Chicago Food Depository again is teaming up with Dominick's Finer Foods and ABC 7 to fight hunger this holiday season. Help us gain a million pounds of food for people in need!

Bring nonperishable items to Dominick's stores throughout the area. We need nutritious food items including peanut butter, canned vegetables and fruits, rice, pasta and cereal.

Toys for Tots collects and distributes toys in the communities. Check out drop sites for toys, including Best Buy.

The Salvation Army Red Kettles have been an American tradition since 1891. They’ve gone a bit high tech this year. To see what I mean, you can go to my Virtual Bell Ringer page and make a donation.

Reflections of

So, Miss Jen G. wrote all about her tv obsessions and I had to chime in with mine. I wish that they were a more refined (mature) selection, as hers seems to be, but I grew up on the Greatest American Hero and developed with Brenda and Kelly on 90210 (though they seemed to have had some help) and I like the drama and the cheese. So for the picking apart by the masses, here is my TV viewing guilty pleasures - mostly in order of the way I watch them:

Football, Football, Football: Love it / Can't get enough of it.

The Amazing Race (insert number here): It is the only game show I still really love. I love seeing all the countries, customs, catty behavior and tasks.

Cold Case: Started watching this, because CBS kept running 60 Minutes over and into The Amazing Race and the only way I could make sure that I had tivo’d the whole episode was to also tivo Cold Case. I am convinced that this was a conspiracy by the network.

How I Met Your Mother: I completely missed the boat on this one and only started watching it, because tivo thought I would like it. (Tivo was right). I think the writing is generally hilarious and that Neil Patrick Harris couldn’t be funnier.

CSI: Miami: Damn this franchise, I seem to watch them all. The more I watch, more I love to make fun of David “We’re going to go catch the criminal” Caruso. (Or whatever that week’s monotone quote while staring at the camera and putting on his sunglasses).

Gilmore Girls: Yeah, still watch it. Will say that while I liked Luke and Lorelei, I was always secretly pulling for Christopher. Feel the show would’ve been different had he not thought he should be on “I’m With Her.” Regardless, I have always loved the fast-paced, overly-peppered-with-pop-culture conversations between the Gilmore Girls.

Veronica Mars: I take credit for getting many obsessed with this show and rightfully so. It is witty, dark, suspenseful and a guilty pleasure. It is the dark side of a Buffy or a 90210. And Jen, Lilly Kane’s murderer is…just kidding – couldn’t do that to you.

3 lbs: Have no idea if I will like it. Tivo’d it to see. Will keep you posted. I really want to like it, because I love Mark Feuerstein and Stanly Tucci. I hope it is not another Studio 60 moment. (a.k.a. Great cast, great idea…still trying to figure itself out).

America’s Next Top Model: I blame my boss for this one. I only started watching it this year. I will say, I enjoy counting how many times Tyra says the phrase: ‘you are still in the running to be America’s Next Top Model’ – insert dramatic pause here.

Top Chef: Something had to fill the Project Runway void.

CSI: NY: God Bless CBS and the innertube. I love that I can watch this show for free (hint, hint NBC) on the Internet. I really like this show more and more.

Ugly Betty: Finally a heroine that is not skinny and perfect. I love America Ferrera for her Curves and her Pants. She has you cringing and cheering for her almost all the time. The weird not-dead Fay plot is odd and campy, but in a fun way. This is probably my favorite new show.

CSI: The original is always the best.

Grey’s Anatomy: Yep, I watch it. In all its nighttime soap-like drama. It is corny and sometimes contrived, but McDreamy is hot and the music is always good and on a Thursday night it fits in well with my routine.

ER: Like Jen, I am back on this one. I hadn’t really left it, but I have re-devoted myself to it. It seems they have gone back to doing what they do best – drama in the ER. They have the new Doug Ross a.k.a John Stamos as Gates. They brought in a new Romano – a.k.a Crenshaw – who is equally irritating in a fun way. They have infused the cast with enough old and new and upped the stories a bit. All in all, this has been one of the best seasons in awhile.

The Office: Slow to catch on to this one too, but am obsessed now. Love Jim and Pam. Have not seen an episode I haven’t liked. Note to NBC, now that you used iTunes to save the show (yep, we all saw the article) how about you replay the show for free like ABC and CBS do with their hits?

Las Vegas: Color this a cheesy, guilty pleasure that I would have dropped if it hadn’t been for tivo.

Numb3rs: I think I watch this one for my mom. It’s a decent Friday night crime drama with math and my consolation for being the daughter of a math teacher, with a BA in English. (Insert “What Do You Do with a B.A. in English” joke here).

Crossing Jordan: If NBC ever puts it back on the air. I have always liked this one and actually picked it over Grey’s Anatomy.

Before there is a brouhaha…I know that I am missing LOST, Prison Break, Bones, the Wire, Weeds and a bunch others. I am pretty sure that I will get to them eventually, but they seem to be destined for NetFlix viewing for me.

Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!

I spent my lunch watching people compete against Rex Grossman in a snowball throwing contest. Not that I want to blatantly toss out free corporate sponsorship (especially since a certain coffee joint can get on my nerves every now and then), but this was a cool event. They made a bunch of snow, put out peppermint mochas (my Achilles' heel), collected money for the neediest kids' fund, gave out free coffee - my favorite blend (Christmas Blend) and I got to see a player from the Chicago Bears. Bonus points for the fact that it was Sexy (though I am way too old for him) Rexy.

It was a fun time and has got me even more excited for Sunday's game. I have to say, J.G. was posting about places she would live instead of Chicago, I can't imagine living anywhere else. Visiting, sure. Moving away from Chicago - don't think so.

Where At Least I Know I’m Free

There are a lot of things wrong with this country. I could spend hours writing about improvements we need to make - healthcare, worker's rights, education, child care...I could go on and on. I could spend days writing about the democrats taking back the Senate and House, Rumsfeld's resignation and the scandals of recent days. To cover G - Dub(ya) and all his shenanigans, I could spend a lifetime at the computer.

And that is what is right about this country. I can speak my piece – peacefully. I have the right to agree (or disagree) with the government. I can practice my faith (or have no faith at all). I can assemble. I can select a government through an election process. After participating in a free election, I can sit back and watch the peaceful transition of power. That is the thing I find most miraculous. Every 4 – 8 years, the supreme leader of this country abdicates power to a newly elected individual. There is no coup de tat. There is no violence. There is just a transfer of power. It really is amazing.

To that end, I would like to take a second to thank those that have defended these rights and privileges for me. (I am remiss in that I am 3 days late on this one)

For those that fought the Revolutionary War, because they believed that taxation without representation was wrong. (I’d like to thank my relative, John Hart, for signing the Declaration of Independence).

For those that fought the Civil War, because they believer that no man (woman or child) should be considered property of another.

To the men and women of World War I and World War II, who fought for their country and defended the democratic ideal.

To the veterans of Korea and Vietnam, who fought in conflicts that were not recognized as wars until years later. The controversy that surrounded these wars made it difficult for those who participated in them and yet there are those that answered the call of duty (or draft) and served their country honorably.

To those members of the military in active service around the world, especially those in Afghanistan and Iraq, our thoughts and prayers are with you and for you.

Regardless of my opinions on this current conflict, I will always proudly support the men and women of the military. They risk their lives every day, defending my rights.

And so, Happy Veteran’s Day to All, but especially my dad (Vietnam Vet – whom I couldn’t be more proud), my friend’s father (proud Marine until the day he passed), my friend Jimmy (career Navy), a kid I used to baby-sit for, which is wrong in many ways (Afghanistan) and my friend’s husband (just returned from Iraq). God Bless America.

Haven’t had a dream in a long time

Last night, the Bears played. I was psyched about the game and looking forward to removing the bitter taste of last week’s loss from my mouth. N., J. and I went to a bar / restaurant to watch the game. We were hungry and some of us may have been a bit hung-over. We got there and there was nowhere to sit. We ate tater tots to hold us over. (They were the only things that would fit on the ledge we were leaning on).

We waited for a table to open up and then watched in frustration as a group that already had 2 tables swallowed up the next available one. (Chivalry is in question now – they really didn’t need the 3rd table to hold their waters). We watched as dating couple got the next one – seriously don’t think they even knew a game was on the TV.

We are now cranky and frustrated and to top it off, the Bears aren’t starting off that well. N. and J. decide to stake out the scene and locate a table that looks ready to go. They find the over-served, non-couple couple and chat with them. They promise us they are leaving soon. Over an hour later, we are frustrated and watching drunk guy close tab after tab. N. goes over to talk to them about facilitating a smooth transition. Next thing you know, she is sitting at table with non-couple couple. Within a few minutes, we are all at their table with them. We watch as the girl throws every “I’m absolutely not interested in you” signal in the book at drunk guy and we watch drunk guy miss them all.

We immediately order drinks and food and continue to watch the game. Interestingly enough, as soon as we procured the table, the Bears started to show us why we love them. Our food comes and we devour it. Well, drunk guy devoured J.’s fries, which was pretty funny to watch. The girl keeps talking to J. and blatantly ignoring Drunk guy. Drunk guy keeps telling us how hot our friend (N.) is and how she is the hottest girl in the bar. The whole thing just kept getting weirder and weirder. (My favorite part was when he kept screaming ‘touchdown’ when the Giants were in the end zone, trying to make it 100 yards down the field. We kept telling him ‘safety,’ ‘safety,’ but it was a moot point. Midway through the mess of this interaction, J. leans over to tell N. and I that she had a philosophical epiphany to tell us later.

And then they left. Drunk guy and date. Separately, thankfully. You know that it is bad when drunk guy date comes back to apologize to us for drunk guy and even wistfully remarks that we look like we were having so much fun (which, we were). She pointed out that this was a completely unsuccessful 4th date and that he wouldn’t go away. When they left, J. leaned over and said to us, “sometimes, it is better to be single than to be on that kind of date.”

It’s true. Whenever I think that I am too picky, I will think of drunk guy and think, it is okay to be picky. It is good to be willing to experience things and try (and fail). But, it is also okay to enjoy your life without putting yourself in drunk guy / bad date path. Does that mean that I am perfect at selecting dates? Obviously not – those that have read this page before know that I make some pretty lame mistakes. However, that girl knew by date 2 that drunk guy was not for her and yet, there she was on disaster date #4. Why? Probably because she doesn’t want to be single her whole life. Well, most people don’t. However, I reiterate, it is better to be single than to be miserable in a relationship. She should’ve gone to watch the games with friends – she would have had a hell of a better time.

As for the Bears, holy hell was that a fun game!

Hester—108 yards and a fake out?? Awesome!
Jones – Bring on the Running Game!
Musin – Wear your moose ears proud, he kicked it up a notch yesterday!
Rex – Wow! Some mistakes, but is seems we got our Sexy-Rexy-Back. (This pun was written intentionally for N., who secretly wants to see Timberlake in concert and will probably hurt me for writing that on this page).

Side note: Thanks to Jen for her ringing endorsement of this page. (I am terrified of that, but hopefully, up to the challenge).

See I'm Smiling

Why is it that the guy you want to talk to lingers just out of reach and the one you could go through life without talking to again spends the day chatting you in email? Weird. On the same note, I may be slow on the uptake, but when I make a decision, it is made. So the getting away from Mr. Toxic is exactly what I did and I have not looked back.

That being said, why does he not get it? Invited me to a party - actually 2 different parties. I politely declined the first invite - thankfully I had another engagement, so I didn't have to make an excuse up. The second invite irritated me though. Well, the snarky tone irritated me. It was the "I'm sure you will be at the blah, blah, blah party." Really, what makes you so sure? Is it the fact that we have barely spoken (except when you were insulting me or being a total jerk) in the last several months? Or the fact that I flat out told you that I didn't want you in my life? Which one gave you the security to think that I would be there? Seriously, ego check on aisle 7.

The funny thing is that we both throw annual events a few weeks apart from each other. Last year, it was a different story. Last year, he was there and it was fun. Well, his party wasn't all that fun. I should have taken that as a sign of things to come, since I was pretty miserable and it was only a few days later that he essentially ditched me on New Year's Eve. This year, I didn't invite him to my party. Why would I? Figured it would be easier on everyone (especially my friends) to leave him off the list. Why didn't he think to extend me the same courtesy?

On a side note, I always said that I wouldn't use this space to say hurtful things, but this is me venting. The way I see it, he never read this when we were together (which was always a point of contention) - he is certainly not going to start now.

Incidentally, only Jen will get the title reference. However, if you are curious, listen to the soundtrack to the Last Five Years. We saw it at the Royal George. It is the saddest, most interesting thing I have seen on stage in awhile. It is chilling to watch a relationship start and disintegrate in both directions.

Devil Inside

Somehow, the last week was swallowed by Halloween festivities. I know a lot of people have a negative taste in their mouth when it comes to Halloween, but I love it. For a shy girl with a few too many insecurities, it is nice to bolster myself with a costume and a cocktail and be a bit more risky then I normally would be.

We went out on Saturday night dressed as deviled eggs. Slightly silly, made funnier by the fact that we blatantly stole the idea from a 5-month old baby. I think that I had more fun Saturday, during the day, running around like crazy searching for our costume parts then I did on Saturday night. Don’t get me wrong, Saturday was fun, but I think we expected too much out of it and it ended up being a normal Saturday night. (Well normal for us is strolling in at 4 AM after a pit stop to the burrito house). I will say that the costumes were a hit. Cute and conversation starters and what more do you want out of Halloween?!?