Random Bits

* People who show up to a kickball field in matching outfits suck. They suck more when they begin to stretch.

* There is nothing harder than waking up on a cold, rainy day and having to get out of bed and go to work.

* No matter how often it happens, a friend prat-falling into a table is always funny. Even if you wind up with a lapful of cocktails.

* Chicago my ass, I am still pissed the Sox won. (Though, I am exicted for my friends who are Sox fans and I am excited that at least one of the teams in the city doesn't stink. I just wish that is wasn't the Sox).

* Traveling with a friend 8-hours anywhere takes a strong friendship. It takes a strong stomach too -- at least if the only thing to eat on the way is cheeseburgers.

* Nothing beats being kissed often by someone who knows how.

Damn, it's on the South Side

Well, it's World Series time and it is coming to Chicago. It's a once in a lifetime experience. (Especially in Chicago). It's good for the economy. It brings pride to the city. It's the damn White Sox. Why did it have to be the White Sox?

People are mad that I am struggling with this. I should cheer for the city. Really? That is the thing that most Sox fans hate about Cubs fans...they think we are not true fans of the game. I think they would respect me for struggling a bit--for not jumping on the bandwagon. It's not that I am cheering against the Sox (well, not entirely), it's just that I am sad. The Red Sox! Now the White Sox! And the lone loser holding up the wall at prom without a date? The Cubs =0( I think if Boston hadn't won in such fine fashion last year and if the Cubs hadn't lost in such heartbreaking fashion in 2003, it would be a different story. It's just a hard pill to swallow.

Will I watch the games? Of course. Will part of me cheer for the White Sox? Sure. I have always liked them--just not with the intensity that I love the Cubs. It's just, you know, why couldn't it have been the Cubs? (Not that I am whining--well, maybe I am a little). I am happy for the city. Just tired of waiting until next year.

To Mark and Deb and all my Sox Fan friends, congrats! May the best team win! Special thanks to Mark for believing that next year really will be the Cubs year! (Logically, if Boston and the White Sox can get there, it must be the Cubs turn!)

Mojo on Aisle 7

When I was 23, one of my best friends passed away suddenly. When Leon died, I wasn't sure I would be able to breathe again, let alone get on with my life. He was the first person that I talked to in the morning, the person I emailed all day long and the last person that I talked to before I went to bed. We talked about everything and nothing. Part of me had a bit of a crush on him, but all of me loved him and the friendship we had. When he died, my heart broke.

As with everything painful, the pain began to subside. Each day, it was a little easier to wake up and go about my life. Except in one area -- dating. For whatever reason, after Leon died, I lost my mojo. I used to joke that he had taken it with him. It seems that soon after, I stopped having confidence in myself and my attractiveness. It's hard to explain, but I lost my confidence.

I have become very cynical about the whole thing. I believe happily ever after. I watch every chick flick and cry at the happy endings. I just wonder how it will ever happen for me. I'm not sure why I'm like this. From what I have been told, I am beautiful. I know that I am smart and kind. Why don't I have more confidence? Whenever I find myself in a situation involving a guy, especially one that I like, it is like I am 6 years old again and on the playground vying for attention. He can tell me that I am beautiful and make overtures to be with me and in the back of my mind, I am waiting for the bottom to drop.

My friends will read this and think that I am crazy. I know that's what I think! Logically, I know that I am a fine catch. It's just there is nothing logical about matters of the heart.

Can Men and Women Just Be Friends? (Part II)

So, I was apparently angst-filled when I wrote the first post on this subject. Or, as usual, I was confused by my own life. Can men and women be friends? Sure they can. I have a lot of guy friends. Have some of those situations become completely awkward? Yep. It is not always good to be the female friend of a guy, especially if he is engaged to a girl who doesn't really like you. (Thankfully, that wedding never happened).

Have I fallen for a guy friend or vice versa? Yep. Sometimes, it works out great. Some of my best relationships with guys have started out as friendships. Sometimes it is a disaster -- especially when feelings are not reciprocated. Sometimes it is confusing. Blurring the line makes it so that you are never quite sure where you stand.

Do I have guy friends without whom I would be lost? Absolutely!! One of my favorite people in the world, who has been my friend since I was the little red haired girl in college, is a guy friend. I saw his name on my blog and realized that the last post was not complete. Since we met 10 years ago (god, that seems like a long time), he has been my friend, confidant, designated driver, advice giver and all around good friend. Life has made our paths shift a bit (he is a proud husband and father, I am still single in the city), but I know that he is always there for me (and vice versa). So, even though it can get complicated and messy, the moral of the story is men and women can be friends...as long as the sex thing doesn't get in the way.

It's just for the first time, I feel ... wicked

I have been once again obsessing over a costume for Halloween. It is hard to be an intelligent girl at Halloween. You want to find a costume that morphs you into something feminine and alluring. You want guys to be entranced by you and your costume. You want to be a little wicked. Yet, when you go shopping there are the costumes that do not flatter at all and then there are hooker versions of every childhood character or toy. This year popular costumes include slutty versions of Strawberry Shortcake, Dorothy, Snow White, Cinderella, Rainbow Brite, Little Red Riding Hood, as well as the ever popular slutty Doctor, Nurse, Police Girl, Super Girl, Wonder Woman and Daisy Duke.

Why is it that sexy means that my butt is hanging out of a too short dress and my breasts are falling out of my too tight top? Maybe it is me. Back in the day (a.k.a. when I was skinnier), I would have worn the Dorothy or the Rainbow Brite costume. But now, I look at them and I wince. I remember going out Halloween last year (I wore my dad's army dress uniform)and looking at all the women out. They were all dressed alike. They were all doing Jaeger Bombs. They were all trying too hard to get noticed.

I like a Halloween costume that is feminine, but assured. I think this is how Elphaba popped into my head. One listen to "Defying Gravity" and you know that she is not only determined, but also a very feminine character. The more I thought about it, the more I liked the idea. Really. Dressing as a witch, with a feminine flair and a subtle beauty and innocence. Seemed perfect. Until I realized the amount of green body paint that would be involved. Some well-meaning friends have pointed out that I could be a mess by the end of the night. Another suggested that I go as Glinda, since there is no body paint involved. Now, I am back to square one. Trying to find the perfect identity for 24 hours. Anyone got any bright ideas?!?

Thank You

On Friday night, I waited on a couple. They drank a glass of wine each, closed out on their card and left. They were really nice, so I was a bit shocked when I went to their table and saw that the guy had not filled out the credit card slip -- including the tip line. I thought it was a bit strange, since they were really nice. I brushed it off and figured it was a fluke. In my gut, I didn't think they were mean or anything.

The next day, I got a call from the afternoon bartender. It seems that the guy had come back into the bar. He said that he and his girlfriend were rushing for a movie and that he had forgot to leave a tip. Money aside, what he did was incredibly nice. Every now and again people restore your faith in them (and all of mankind). So, thank you to the gentleman. To the lady, I say, hang onto him, he is obviously a keeper.

Psychiatric Help 5 Cents

Ever find yourself doling out advice in droves? It has been like that for me the last few weeks. What I can't understand is why I can give advice (and good advice at that) to others, but can't advise myself to save my life?!?

How come we are able to help others and not ourselves?

I Think I Pulled My Hamstring

I played kickball on Sunday for the first time since grade school. My friends formed a team and I thought it would be a hilarious way to pretend that I am healthy-exercise girl. I was nervous about playing, because I am competitive and like to be good at what I do and because I had been teasing my friend for the past two weeks. (Scott had struck out in a plate appearance in each of the first 2 games). I figured the teasing and the fact that I had missed the first 2 games would karmically screw me. I was right -- sort of...

Once again, I was put in Centerfield. A position for the athletically-challenged. A position I hate. Especially in sports leagues where one field butts against another and center field can go on for miles. Let's just say a bouncing ball is not an easy thing to shag and throw back to the infield.

At the plate, I fared a little better. I actually got a hit (kick?) and scored a run. It was a lot of fun and we won our first game. Had bloody mary's and fun conversation for the rest of the afternoon. I went home early, feeling athletic and great.

I woke up on Monday morning feeling like a) a big truck had rolled over me and b) I had been riding a horse. I am pretty sure that I pulled every muscle from my ribcage down. Who knew kickball could be so physical? Maybe that is why you only play it in grade school.