Maybe I'm Brainless

A friend of mine emailed me today and asked me if I was familiar with "Avenue Q." She thought that "A Fine, Fine Line" perfectly described my recent dating debacle. I concurred, as I had made that discovery months ago. (Though, I always thought that Ani had a few things to say about the situation as well). Without wasting everyone's time with drama details, I'll give you Kate Monster's synopsis of my last few months:

"There's a fine, fine line between a fairy tale and a lie;
And there's a fine, fine line between "You're wonderful" and "Goodbye."
I guess if someone doesn't love you back it isn't such a crime,
But there's a fine, fine line between love
And a waste of your time.

And I don't have the time to waste on you anymore.
I don't think that you even know what you're looking for.
For my own sanity, I've got to close the door
And walk away...

There's a fine, fine line between together and not
And there's a fine, fine line between what you wanted and what you got.
You gotta go after the things you want while you're still in your prime...

There's a fine, fine line between love
And a waste of time."

Sad, but true. And so I closed the door on that chapter of my life, because it was the right thing to do. I deserve a lot more than I have gotten, especially since most of it has been grief and some pretty nasty words. And people thought that I might waiver, but I haven’t and I won’t. There is no looking back. (Think Bye Bye Love…Jo Dee Messina-style). I don’t want to.

Right now there is a window opening (sorry for the Sound of Music reference, but it was right there for the taking) and it is refreshing. It is the slow unfolding of possibilities that is so enthralling. The stage that takes you back to every playground crush you ever had. The something to look forward to...I don't know what it is, but it is fun and there hasn't been a lot of that lately. I almost feel as if the drama and the messiness were necessary to make it so easy to see the good when it was right in front of me. And that is all I am going to say for now, because there are some things that I like to keep to myself.